Today was my only day off; after school I work on Monday, Friday and Saturday, Tuesdays and Thursdays are spent with the boyfriend, as are most of Sundays. Wednesday, however, is mine to spend as I see fit after I finish school at 5.

A frenzy of school work and bills has caught me in its rushing grasp, delighting me with the thrill of true progress and burdening me with hours of school and work that takes 6 days of my week. This one day, as redundant as the epitaph is, is my escape. I am free to watch TV, eat a bag of popcorn, or work out if I so desire, all in an attempt to forget the deadlines and be lazy for an evening. My routine, however, has robbed me of that leisure. Only a month of school has gone by and already I get anxious when I’m not hurried. A nervously psychotic smile explodes onto my lips and fades the second I think of how to best utilize the free time. I want to do everything I’ve forsaken in sight of work and end up bogging myself down in a flurry of 5 lazy activities I foolishly endeavor to do at the same time. It honestly took me 2 episodes to figure out that exercising, watching sex and the city, eating fruit snacks all while trying to stuff my face with popcorn is simply not a good idea.

My bedtime has come and a wave of nausea settles throbbingly on top of the usual exhaustion. My head aches from the sugar of the 4 packs of fruit snacks, and all I can think about is the studying I could have done.

I suck at this game.